


High and Dry

by whathappenedinwellington



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Anniversary, Awkward Sexual Situations, Bottom Harry, Crack, Hospitals, M/M, Sex Toys, Vibrators
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-10
Updated: 2017-01-10
Packaged: 2018-09-16 14:18:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9275774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whathappenedinwellington/pseuds/whathappenedinwellington
Summary: Harry gets a 6-inch vibrator stuck in his arse. Hospital is the last place he wants to spend his and Louis' 2-year Anniversary.





	

“I can’t believe this is happening to me right now,” Harry muttered from his stiff position in the passenger’s seat of the car, Louis in the driver’s seat manoeuvring the Range Rover through the heavy London traffic. It had just begun showering outside and little droplets of rain tracked their path down the shiny, black exterior. It was a dreary Sunday and it seemed no one was in a particular hurry.

Harry’s back was straight and rigid against the leather interior, his right leg crossed tightly over his left and his flaming face rested against against the cool window. His eyes were tightly pressed closed, accentuating the little creases beside them, as he attempted to focus all of his attention on evening his breaths and calming his wild heart rate. 

The Range Rover was a quiet car, the radio was off and all that could be heard in the silent space was a faint buzzing. The sound did nothing to cool his burning cheeks.

He felt Louis’ hand grip his knee, the touch causing his eyelids to burst open and him to squirm further into the seat. Harry vaguely recalls learning something in high school about senses becoming heightened when one is taken away and opts to keep his eyes open for now. When his eyes finally adjusted to the light after being pressed closed for so long, it was so see his boyfriend of 2 years smirking at him.

Harry tilted his head and frowned, “I’m sorry, do you find this funny?”

Louis smirk formed into a full faced, joker-like grin. He swept his hand from Harry’s knee up his inner thigh, watching the way his boyfriend writhed in his seat before smacking his wondering hand away (probably a little _too_ aggressively if you were to ask Louis). Louis brought his hand back to the wheel. “A little bit, yeah.”

“You’re unbelievable.” Harry rested his head back against the headrest, eyes closed once more. Fuck it. “This is not in the slightest bit funny. This is humiliating.”

“Admit it, Harry. It’s a smidge funny.”

“It’s not!” Frustrated tears welled up in Harry’s eyes. He inhaled deeply through his nose, shakily letting go of the breath out of his mouth before continuing, “This is my first full weekend off work in God knows how long and… and this is your fault this is happening and you don’t even have the decency to be sympathetic! Or apologetic, for that matter! This isn’t exactly pleasurable you know! It’s been over 3 hours, Louis! What if I have permanent damage? I can’t—”

“Hey, hey.” Louis murmurs.

Harry realises that he’s just further working himself up and he needs to calm the fuck down if he wants his heart to stop beating so erratically and his anxiety levels to decrease by even the slightest bit. He feels on the verge of a panic attack and apparently Louis can sense it too, if his sudden soothing tone is anything to go by.

Louis reaches for Harry’s hand linking their fingers together and soothingly rubbing his thumb over the back of his hand. Harry’s tense shoulders visibly droop.

“I’m sorry, I’m only teasing,” Louis sighs. “It’s all going to be okay. Please don’t stress, love. I’m sorry you’re in this situation, I am, but we’ll be at St Thomas’ in less than – “

“No,” Harry interrupts, panic obvious in his wide eyes, “we can’t go to St Thomas’! My _sister_ works there, Louis! What if we see her? We have to go to a different hospital.”

Louis sighs, “Love, the next hospital will take us over an hour to get to. We need to get this fixed as soon as possible, you said it yourself. Anyway, the chances of running into your sister is very little. She’s in the maternity ward, we’ll be in the ER. We’ll be in and out, I promise.”

Harry snorts, bitterly. “In and out? Well, I know you’ve got the ‘in’ part down, not so much the ‘out’”

Louis laughs so hard that Harry can’t help letting out a few chuckles of his own despite his not so favourable feelings towards his boyfriend, and life is general, at this very moment. Laughing at his jokes was always a sure way to his heart—a direct passage even.

“Stop, kind of hurts to laugh.”

Louis squeezes his hand, where they rest together on the centre console. Harry wants to smack the amused tilt to his lips right off his face.

“Not long now, babe. The traffic is easing so we should be no more than 10 minutes away.”

 

 

_It was Louis and Harry’s 2-year anniversary as a couple. It was a dreary Sunday and they had woken mid-morning, wrapped up in one another, happy and well rested from a decent sleep in. Now, they continue to sit cuddled together in their bed with freshly brewed tea on each of their bedside tables and a massive plate of home-made blueberry pancakes resting on their laps to share._

_“Mmm, so good Harry,” says Louis, shovelling a loaded forkful of fruity pancake into his mouth. His mouth is still full of half chewed dough when he says, “I knew there was a reason I’ve put up with you for 2 years.”_

_Despite the way Louis phrased it, Harry can’t help it when butterflies erupt in his stomach because, yeah. 2 years. They officially became boyfriends exactly 2 years ago on this day and Harry can say with full honesty that it has been the best 2 years of his life so far. He’s content in knowing that the rest of his years are only going to get better and better from here on out. Louis in every single one of them._

_“Put up with me? What about you, huh?” Harry teasingly says, “2 years and you’re still talking with your mouth full even though you know it drives me insane. Been putting up with that since our first date, haven’t I?”_

_Louis chuckles, “You clearly didn’t mind that much considering you said yes to coming to see a movie with me after we finished eating.”_

_“You said you were paying.” Harry smirked._

_Louis throws his head back laughing, shaking his head he says, “You little gold digger.” His laughter has reduced to somewhat-amused snickers when he says, “Still, you mustn’t have found me too repulsive since you gave me a blowie right after said movie.”_

_Harry just shrugs though he knows that Louis knows that he’s just teasing._

_Louis scoops up the last bite of the pancakes and raises it to Harry’s mouth before pecking his lips, sweetly. He moves the empty plate to his bedside table and picks up his tea in passing, Harry doing the same. They both settle back against the mountain of pillows with their tea, Harry scooting lower to rest his head against Louis shoulder, his arm instinctively wrapping around his waist._

_“Happy 2 years, darling.” Louis raises his mug in toast, “To many more.”_

_Harry clinks his mug with Louis’, repeating, “To many more.”_

It took approximately 10 minutes for Louis to coax Harry out of the car once parked in the hospitals’ lot. Harry’s pleas of _“let’s try one more time ourselves before going in”_ and _“what if it moved during the car journey, we can just go home and get it out there”_ and even _“it’s really not so bad, I think I could learn to live with it”_ went unheard as Louis crossed his arms and turned his back as he waited for Harry to get out of the car.  

It then took a further 5 minutes for Harry to build up the courage to walk through the doors to the ER but eventually the discomfort and bizarre feeling of public indecency became to much to ignore and he relented.

“Hello,” Harry awkwardly waves to the lady at the front desk of the ER.

She smiles kindly, “Hello, what can I do for you?”

Harry opens his mouth but no words come out because what the actual fuck is he meant to say? Why didn’t he think about this in the bloody 40-minute drive they spent stuck in stupid, fucking stand-still traffic? He’s frozen and now he’s panicking because the receptionist looks genuinely concerned and he doesn’t think he could even say the words right now without either laughing or crying. Maybe both. He’s hyperaware of every single person in the room and prays that no one is paying him any mind. There’s children _everywhere_ , for fucks sake.

Harry turns to Louis by his side, wide eyed and like a child pleading his mother to answer the adult for him.

“Uh, Harry here has got like,” Louis breaks off into a fit of giggle and Harry can’t believe this is happening, “sorry he’s got, um.”

The receptionist looks back and forth between them questioningly as Louis continues to giggle, Harry’s mouth set into a frustrated line. She looks annoyed now, like they’re wasting her time and well—they are.

“I have a six-inch vibrator stuck up my bum.” Harry finds the courage to quickly interject, face heating up instantly. He resists the urge to do a scan of the room to see if anyone was listening. _Please God let no innocent children be listening in._

“It’s been 3 and a half hours at least. The thing is still vibrating! It’s a good quality one I ordered online. Only the best for my baby.” Louis jokes unhelpfully, patting the laughter induced tears forming under his eyes while wrapping his free arm around Harry’s waist. The thing about Louis is when he finds himself in awkward situations he suffers from severe verbal diarrhea. Until this point, Harry’s had only ever found it endearing.

Harry just ducks his head down and (not for the first time today) wills himself to wake up from this nightmare. He doesn’t. When he raises his head to look at the receptionist, it’s to a look somewhere between discomfort and sympathy.

“Right, okay,” the receptionist types something into her computer, long nails tapping against the keys furiously. She fumbles around on her desk for a few moments before handing over a form attached to a clip board alongside a black pen. “Could you please fill this form out for us and a doctor will be right with you. Please, take a seat… Sorry dear, my apologies, can you sit?”

Harry cringes at her words, mumbling a hushed “yes” before turning on his heal and walking to the closest vacant seat in the waiting room with his head angled down, face hidden from any judgment. Louis takes the seat next to him and Harry is once again reminded of the faint hum the vibrator causes as it buzzes inside of him, paranoid that everyone else in the room can hear it and know what has happened. The intensity of the vibrations hasn’t diminished at all and despite his humiliation, his dick is still half hard and his jeans are so incredibly restricting that it’s just plain painful at this point. Louis tried to put him into a loose pair of joggers as they were leaving, he did, but Harry refused and now this is his punishment for his insistence on looking presentable in public 100% of the time.

He tosses the clipboard into Louis lap, sinking lower into his chair so that he’s half laying down with his head inclined against the back of the chair with his arms thrown over his face. It’s still burning a deep red. Why is this damn vibrator so good? Why is it still vibrating? Why is it so prostate precise? Why is this his life? Why? Why? Why?

“Be a dear and fill that out for me, please.”

Louis leans over and pecks him on the nose. “Only because you said please.”

“Not because this is your fault in the first place?” Harry snorts.

“Harry,” Louis sighs, “you do actually understand that this isn’t my fault, right? It just happened, no one’s fault.”

Harry knows this. He knows he’s being snappy and Louis is being as helpful as he can be but can he _really_ be blamed for being a little moody?

“Yes, Louis. It’s not your fault, just let me brood.”

Harry keeps his arms over his eyes, not particularly wanting anyone to see him right now, let alone be stuck in a room full of people who are all sitting around with nothing to do _but_ look at each other.

He feels like everyone eyes are on him and everyone knows. Of course they aren’t and they don’t but there has never been a time in his life that he has felt more paranoid than in this situation, right now. 

 

 

_“Are you ready for your present?” Harry asks, leaning over to his bedside table, opening the top drawer and taking out the simple white envelope._

_“Hang on, just let me get yours.”_

_Louis springs out of bed, retreating to their shared walk-in closet emerging with 2 wrapped gifts. One small and square the other much bigger (about the size of a shoe box) and rectangular in shape._

_“Oooh two gifts,” he wiggles his eyebrows, “I must be special.”_

_“Mmm, you’re definitely something.” Louis winks. “This one,” he holds up the smaller present, “is your main gift.” Lowering his arm and holding up the larger of the two he says, “This one is a bit of a gag gift. I mean, it’ll definitely be used but... I don’t know why I’m still talking, you can just see for yourself. Which one do you want first?”_

_Harry scrunches his lips side to side, left to right, in deliberation, “Gimme the proper one first.”_

_Neither of them bothered to put clothes on this morning, not even pants, and Louis’ soft cock sways between his legs as he moves. He kneels back on the bed, crawling his way to the other side to plop down in front of Harry. He puts the larger present in his own lap before dramatically presenting Harry with the other one. “For you, my love.”_

_“Why thankyou.”_

_Ripping the paper, Harry is presented with a little blue velvet jewellery box. He opens the box to see a thick silver band with two thin lines engraved around the perimeter. It’s delicate and simple and so, so beautiful. It’s so on par with his personal taste that only someone who really knew him would be able to pick it out and that alone makes his heart grow just that bit bigger. He pulls the ring out of it’s casing, sliding it onto his middle finger on his right hand._

_His eyes are starting to well up with tears as he stares down at it. A single tear runs down his cheek and he feels breathless as he says, “Louis… It’s beautiful. I love it.”_

_Harry takes his eyes away from the ring to look at Louis. He’s knows that he’s absolutely beaming because Louis is beaming right back._

_“I’m glad you like it.” Louis takes his right hand into his own, running his thumb over the ring. “I feel like the pressures really on when I buy you jewellery because you have so much and such a unique taste. It’s a good fit on this finger, too. Looks good there.”_

_Harry slips his hand from his grasp, moving it to the back of Louis’ neck and pulling him in for a kiss. His lips are still hovering over Louis’ when he says, “It’s perfect, Louis, just like you. Thankyou. I truly love it.”_

_He punctuates this by leaning in once more and smacking a loud kiss on Louis’ lips._

_“You didn’t even see the best part,” says Louis. “Look at the inside.”_

_Harry tilts his head questioningly as he slides the ring off._

_The tears that had since dried up immediately return. On the inside of the ring reads H &L 22/09/14. Their anniversary. Their initials next to their anniversary date written in a delicate script is the second most beautiful thing Harry has ever laid his eyes on. Louis will always be the first.  _

_“It’s a promise ring,” Louis explains. “I’m going to marry you one day, Harry Styles, if you’ll have me of course. I know we’re not ready for that step in our lives yet but I just wanted to make this promise to you that one day…”_

_“Louis,” Harry chokes, a steady stream of tears now running down his cheeks. Louis swipes underneath his eyes with both of his thumbs, palms gentle against the sides of his head. “I love you so much. I’m never taking it off. God, my gift is going to look piss weak after this.”_

_Harry hands the envelope over to Louis before grabbing a tissue from his bed side table to wipe away any lingering tears and blow his nose. Louis examines the plain, white paper before ripping the top open and pulling out a few folded sheets of paper. His eyes bulge and Harry grins._

_“Spain?” Louis shouts. “Harry, you bought up flights to Spain?!” He flicks through the papers, eyes scanning left to right wildly as he skims over the documents. “This is… Harry, how could this be piss weak?! Thankyou, so much babe, this is fucking ace.”_

_“Of course,” Harry leans in to kiss both of Louis cheeks, followed by his nose. “You’ve never been and I love it there so I want to share it with you. Two whole weeks all to ourselves, it’ll be perfect.”_

_Louis keeps reading through the papers, massive grin on his face and shaking his head disbelievingly, “I can’t wait.”_

_Folding the papers back into the envelope, Louis shoves Harry’s second present into his lap. “Your turn.”_

_Harry takes the wrapped gift in his hands, giving it a little shake as if that would give away it’s contents._

_“Harry, don’t shake it. What if it was fragile?”_

_“Is it?” Harry quips._

_Louis just laughs. “Come on, just open it.”_

_Harry did and his eyebrows immediately rose._

_“Like it?” Louis smirked._

_It was a dildo. No scratch that, it was a vibrator. A pretty pink, yet intimidating-looking vibrator. He read from the box, “_ _The Quinn Prostate Vibe is a 6-inch ribbed silicone perfect for beginners to advanced prostate players. The ribs gradually increase in size, growing from 1 inch in diameter up to 1.5 inches and are designed to rub and massage every inch of your backdoor! Beginners can play with the first rib or two— “_

_“Boring” Louis interjects._

_“—while more experienced users can handle the rest of the vibrator with ease.”_

_“Now we’re talking.”_

_“The Quinn Prostate Vibe features a tapered tip for effortless penetration with an enlarged head that makes your prostate easier than ever to find. The multi-speed vibrator offers a wide range of stimulation – ranging from a soft and gentle low to a powerful high. You control the vibrator with a simple dial on the base, just twist it to turn the vibrator on or off and to change speeds.”_

_Harry looks up from the box to Louis’ smirking face, he raises his eyebrows and says, “you’re a minx.”_

_“Fancy taking a test drive?” Louis wiggles his eyebrows._

_“Absolutely.”_

“Excuse me, Sir.” Harry startles at the sound of the strangers’ voice. He opens his eyes to see a young woman in scrubs standing in front of his seat in the emergency waiting room. “Would you like to come with me please? We have a private room we think you will be more comfortable in while you wait.”

Harry let’s out a breath of relief, standing from his chair he thanks the woman profusely. He and Louis follow her down a hall and into small, single room.

“Lay down and make yourself comfortable.” The nurse says upon ushering them into the room. “And stop looking so embarrassed, darling. You’d be surprised how often these sort of things happen. It’s really no big deal.”

Harry chuckles, despite himself, kneeling on the bed before carefully laying back against the pillows. “Thankyou for trying but I don’t think anything you say is going to make me feel any less humiliated.”

“I told him he needed to lighten up and try to see the funny side.” Louis tells the nurse. “He wasn’t having it though.”

“It our anniversary, Louis,” Harry counters. “Excuse me for not seeing the humour.”

“Oh, happy anniversary, darlings! How long has it been?”

“2 years.” Louis replies. “Hopefully there is a third, you know… after all this,” he chuckles light-heartedly.

The nurse laughs, turning towards Harry she says, “Honey, trust me once this is all over you’ll be able to laugh about it. It’ll be a good dinner party story. For now, try not to be too embarrassed, the staff here are all very professional and trust me, we’ve seen it all. This wouldn’t even be in the top 10 sex related emergencies I’ve seen in my time here.”

“What’s the worst you’ve seen?” Louis enquires. “If you’re allowed to say, of course.”

Appearing reminiscent, the nurse shakes her head side to side. “We once had a woman come in who had put a glass perfume bottle inside her vagina. The bottle shattered, it basically shredded her. Oh and there was still perfume in the bottle so it was like burning her vagina! That’s probably the worst one I’ve ever seen, it was awful, the poor girl. She was very embarrassed, much like you but we had a good laugh, she was a sweet girl.”

Harry winces, “Okay, at least were not _that_ stupid.”

“Nah, not stupid all,” the nurse waves him off like this is all nothing, “we’re all human and shit happens sometimes. If there was anyone to blame, it’d be the company that manufactured the vibrator! Faulty design, I say. Anyway I need to keep moving but Dr Payne will be helping you out today—I know terrible name for a doctor but trust me he’s a sweetheart, you’ll be in good hands. He won’t be too long so just relax. Call if you need anything.”

With that, the nurse exits and Louis and Harry are alone once more.

“So, babe.” Louis fails to control his amused tilt to his lips as he says, “How you feelin’ now?”

Harry stares at him blankly, utterly unamused, for a total of ten seconds before sighing, “Louis, I will not hesitate to get you removed from this room.”

“Love, I’m being genuine here, I swear!” Louis crosses his heart but the wobble to his lips and the amused twitch of his nose give him away.

“Honestly? This thing is pressing up against my prostate, like _so_ spot on, and my dick won’t go flaccid no matter how humiliated I am and my balls are aching. Oh and my boyfriend is a piece of shit.” Harry sighs, “Do you think it would be weird if I took my jeans off?”

“Now now, love. We don’t want to do any more damage,” Louis raises his eyebrows suggestively.

Harry throws one of the crisp, freshly fluffed pillows that rests behind his back at him. It leaves him one pillow down but the satisfying slapping noise it makes as it hits Louis right in the side of the face is well worth it.

“Hey,” Louis throws the pillow back gently, “I was just joking. Yes, take the jeans off, you’re going to have to take them off for them off eventually, aren’t you? I promise I’ll keep my hands to myself.”

Harry has his fly and zipper undone and is shimmying out of his jeans when a sudden realisation halts his movements with the denim cuffing his ankles.

“What?”

“I didn’t shave,” Harry deadpans.

Louis sighs, “Again… what?”

“I haven’t shaved down there in fucking _ages_ and there’s going to be like multiple people looking and judging me! Fucking hell. Was it like _really_ bad?”

“Harry, stop. Why are you worrying about that? Who cares?”

“I care!” Harry just about shouts. He lowers his voice to a more appropriate volume to say, “Are you forgetting you’re talking to the same person who took 6 months of dating you to let you see a single ungroomed hair down there?”

“Harry, c’mon, I thought you were over that. You have hardly any hair, it’s fine. I think the doctor might be a little pre-occupied with the 6-inch object that is literally stuck inside your body to pay any attention to your bloody manscaping,” Louis chuckles.

Harry raises a single brow. “Can you take me seriously for one second? How would you feel if I was laughing at you when you were having a medical emergency?”

“Harry, do you actually hear yourself?” Louis quips. “You seriously need to overcome your arse hair insecurity. I believe in you, you can do it.”

“Whatever,” he rolls his eyes, “I’m shaving as soon as I get home.”

“Might be a little tender.” Louis quips moments before the same pillow is being propelled at his head once more.

_“Fuck, Louis! Right there!”_

_Harry feels erratic. There is a deep flush from his face all the way down to his neck and his whole body feels like it is on fire as Louis’ clever fingers repeatedly prod at his prostate. His other hand is on his cock and Harry has to put all of his concentration into not fucking up into his fist. His hands are fisting the edges of the duvet so tight his knuckles have lost colour._

_“Ready for it, darling? Ready for vibe?” Louis asks right by his ear, his hot breath on Harry’s neck causing him to whine._

_“Yes, fuck, yeah I’m ready.”_

_Louis plants a wet, open mouthed kiss on his neck. “Good boy.”_

_Louis uses the vibrator to tease his slick rim at first. He hasn’t turned it on yet and Harry already feels on edge just from the gentle pressure against his sensitive skin. He’s laying on his back with his knees pulled up to his chest, fully open and exposed for Louis who has situated himself between his legs. Something about this just feels so naughty, it’s like having sex in your parent’s house—It’s invigorating and its so fucking hot._

_When the head of the vibrator first breaches his rim, Harry can’t hold back the moan that is pulled from deep within him. The vibe is so hard yet so soft and it feels like the next best thing to an actual, real life cock. And that’s what he thought before the vibrations even started._

_When Louis first turns the vibrator on, Harry jolts so hard that the headboard smacks against the wall. He instinctively reaches out for his throbbing cock, Louis hand slapping his away before it even makes contact. Suddenly the vibrator is forced past the first ridge. Then the next. Then the next, until its in all the way, buzzing against his prostate and massaging his walls with an intensity that verges perfectly on too much._

_“Feels so good. So, so good,” Harry breathes._

_“Yeah?” Louis turns up the intensity of the vibrations as he continues to deeply nudge the toy against his prostate. He had prepped him well and the toy fits with the perfect burn inside of him._

_“Oh! Fuck, yes. Yes, Louis, fuck this feels so good. Ahhh… So fucking good.”_

_“Yeah?” Louis punctuates the question with a harsh thrust of the vibe. The angle changes slightly and Harry just about screams at the sweet pressure of the toy against the sensitive bundle of nerves inside of him._

_“Y-yeah,” he stutters out._

_“You’re doing so fucking good, babe. Love seeing you like this. Love seeing you let yourself go. Think you can handle a higher setting?”_

_Louis starts kissing his thighs, alternating sucking and biting between kisses, as he continues the steady rhythm with the vibrator. Harry feels so on edge already and he doesn’t actually know if he can handle a higher setting but he nods nonetheless. The consequence is too much at first but it’s so good, he doesn’t want it to stop._

_“I can’t believe I get to see this for the rest of my life. I can’t believe you chose me. I’m the luckiest man, Harry. The absolute luckiest man in the world.”_

_And then it happens._

_Louis was pumping the toy so deep that when he lost his grip on the base, the entirety of the toy was sucked past Harry’s rim._

_“Louis, ahhh…. too much! Please, turn it down… ahh, fuck! I n-need you to turn it down.”_

_“Shit! Sorry!” Louis’ fingers are inside of him and the toy is still buzzing away. “I can’t get it, shit, fuck. It’s like stuck?”_

_It takes Harry a few seconds to comprehend what he’s just said but when he does, his stomach drops, “Louis! What the fuck do you mean it’s s-stuck? Fuck, please just… turn it down!”_

_“I can’t find the dial!” Louis is panicking. Harry can hear is in his voice._

 

“Hello boys, I’m Doctor Payne. I’ll be helping you today. Seems like you’ve found yourself in a bit of a predicament, eh?”

“You could say that.” Harry mutters. They’ve only been waiting in the private room for about 10 minutes and Harry is beyond relieved to already have a Doctor available to help. He’s starting to feel lightheaded and weak, especially since he laid down.

Doctor Payne turns to Louis, extending his hand in greeting. “And you are?”

“Louis,” he smiles, taking his hand. “I’m the boyfriend.”

“Ahh, okay.” Doctor Payne nods. Turning to Harry, he says, “I take it you don’t mind Louis being in the room while we do the examination?”

Harry shakes his head, “Nah, he’s fine here.”

“Okay, well I see you’ve already taken your jeans off so I take it your pretty keen to get this underway, am I right?”

Harry blushes, “Yeah, sorry. Was a bit uncomfortable.”

“No problems at all. Would you mind taking your pants off and laying down on your front for me? I can step out of the room while you get yourself situated if that would make you more comfortable?”

“No, no, it’s fine. I don’t mind if you stay,” Harry reassured. “Kind of just want to get this over and done with as quickly as possible, if that is okay.”

Doctor Payne nods. “No problems at all.”

Harry slips his pants off, folding them and putting them on top of his jeans in the chair next to Louis’. Louis rolls his eyes as he neatly situates them, brushing out the creases, Harry poking his tongue out in retaliation. Louis stands out of his chair as Harry’s crawling back on the bed, resituating the pillows for him to comfortably lay on his front.

Once set, Louis leans down to kiss behind his ear. “It’s almost over. Just relax, babe, you’re a gay champion.”

Harry turns his head to face Louis, nodding before scrunching his lips into a kiss. Louis obliges immediately, pecking his lips delicately.

“Oh so you’ve forgiven me now that you want me to hold your hand. I see how it is.” Louis jokes.

The sound of rubber gloves snapping against skin causes Louis to re-seat himself, scooting the chair back to give the Doctor better access to Harry.

“Okay, I’m going to examine the area now so we can figure out a plan of action. I will have to do a bit of touching and feeling around and it will probably be a bit uncomfortable, as I’m sure you’re aware by now. I will tell you before I do anything though so do try to relax.”

“Sorry about the hair, by the way… need to shave.”

Harry doesn’t even have to turn his head to know that Louis has rolled his eyes. Doctor Payne simply laughs, “That is no problem at all.”

Harry feels he’s cheeks being pushed apart and he winces at the cold air on his entrance.

Doctor Payne winces and Harry heart skips a beat. “Yikes. Wasn’t aware it was vibrating. You poor thing.”

“Tell me about it,” Harry sighs.

“I’m going to use some lubricant now, is that okay?” Doctor Payne asks.

Harry’s face is pressed into the pillow so his voice is slightly muffled when he replies, “Of course.”

“Did I not do a good enough job for you, Doc?” Louis jokes, Harry’s arm shooting out from the bed in Louis direction. He misses him by about a foot, Louis chuckling and taking his outstretched hand in his own and intertwining their fingers before resting them by Harry’s side on the bed.

Doctor Payne takes the joke in his strike, laughing amicably, “No, no. We just want to ensure this is as comfortable as possible for Harry. We’re better off using too much than not enough, right?”

 

 

_“I think you’re supposed to like… squat? Maybe try putting your leg up on the counter and like bending a bit, maybe?”_

_The vibrator has been stuck inside of him for about half an hour now, Louis spending that entire time failing to get it out so now Harry has taken matters into his own hands. They’re in the ensuite now, Harry trying everything to get the stupid thing out while Louis sits on the counter, watching and providing unhelpful comments and suggestions. He’s gotten himself off once which made him that much more sensitive. His hands are shaking as his fingers prod at his own entrance in a futile attempt at coaxing the toy out._

_“Louis, that’s how women remove tampons from their vaginas not 6 inch dildos from their assholes!” he huffs, “Stop googling shit!”_

 

Doctor Payne concludes that the simplest plan of action would be to inject Harry with a muscle relaxant which would obviously help to ease the toy out but also make sure the extraction as comfortable for Harry as possible. On a normal day, Harry would probably whine about having to get a shot but right now he’s more than compliant. He’s eager.

Doctor Payne stays in the room, chatting to both him and Louis while they wait for the relaxant to kick in. It’s actually not as awkward as Harry would’ve imagined chatting to a stranger while naked from the waist down with his bum on full display. Doctor Payne seems like a genuinely nice bloke and if there is any positive to this situation, it would be that.

“Okay, I think the relaxant has kicked in. I’m feeling pretty loose.” Harry concludes after about 5 to 10 minutes. He’s actually starting to feel quite sleepy with it.

“Perfect,” Doctor Payne stands from his chair, walking to the other side of the room to retrieve a fresh pair of gloves, “shall we see if we will have any success at the extraction now?”

Harry sighs, “Yeah, I’m _so_ ready to be done with this.”

“Alright, I’m going to be touching the area now. Make sure you tell me if there is any pain or discomfort and I will stop, alright?”

Harry nods before his cheeks are being pushed apart once more and gloved fingers are entering him. It feels so wrong and it makes his hips squirm on the mattress slightly.

Doctor Payne’s fingers still inside of him, “Alright?”

Harry nods once more, Louis squeezing his hand comfortingly.

It’s uncomfortable, but after just a minute the toy is extracted with an unbelievable ease and a satisfying, yet disgusting slurping noise which makes Harry’s cheeks heat up. Regardless of his embarrassment, he feels like cheering or something equally ridiculous.

“Perfect.” Doctor Payne says, satisfied with his work. “I’m just going to do a quick examination, everything seems to be fine but we’ll just check that no damage has been done and then you can be on your way.”

The examination is quick and pretty painless. As strange as it is, Harry’s kind of gotten used to the uncomfortable sensation of a total stranger touching his most intimate spot in a totally _non-_ intimate way. Both him and Louis get the “be more careful next time” talk which flashes him right back to being sixteen years old, sitting at his dining table and getting the safe sex talk from his step-dad. They also get the “no penetrative sex for a couple weeks” rule, which _pft_ , okay _._

They definitively decline the offer of having the vibrator sterilised and returned for them to take home. As good of a sex toy as it was, Harry’s _definitely_ had more than enough use of it.

“Oh and one more thing before you leave.” Doctor Payne ruffles around the top draw of the cabinets on the opposite side of the bed before pulling out two lolly pops, one blue and the other green. He hands the blue one to Louis and the green to Harry.

At Louis and Harry’s confused faces, Doctor Payne smirks, “Happy Anniversary. Nurse Trudy told me,” he winks, “Go and enjoy the rest of your special day, young lovers. Not too much fun though! That is Doctors orders!”


End file.
